Track thighs

My youngest baby is four months old on Tuesday and I am starting to come to terms with the baby weight. Not his, but mine. I gained, oh somewhere in the neighborhood of 50 pounds, and I was already 15 pounds overweight. Apparently, according to the health experts my ideal weight is between 112 and 145 pounds. As of about a week ago, I am at 186. Now, I was 212 when I gave birth, so I'm not doing too shabby. Still, the inches of fat on my belly and thighs (and everywhere else it seems) are starting to make me insecure. I mean insecure in that i-don't-want-my-husband-to-look-at-other-women way. And this is silly. Really silly. My husband loves me. Loves me AND finds be physically attractive even at 40 lbs over the legal limit. What more can I ask for, right? But after seeing Beyonce shake her rump enough times, I get that itch. It's like I wish I could just lazer off the extra parts, and leave the Beyonce curves. I actually have some good curves, they are just a little curvier than I would like them to be. And you know, it is motivation, all of this booty-shakin on TV. I even hear a song on the radio and feel the urge to run off some of those pounds. It is just.....so....sssllllooooowwww. But, you want to know what is really ridiculous? Life is not about looking pretty. It really isn't. Although I did catch my eye in the mirror the other day and thought, "Oh, I am cute!" Like I said, it is way too late. I gotta get some sleep.

Blog Block

So, my frustration is that the only time I sit down to write it is far too late, i have been up with the babies as they wrestle through sleep, and I am too tired to remember any of the witty things that my kids do during the day. The truth is, they are really, really amazing. They do things I never thought little kids did, that I don't remember doing. They act more grown-up than most grown ups, and they definitely have more common sense. Akeem just wants my uninterrupted, undivided attention all of the time, and he insists on eye contact. He knows that I am not really watching or listening half of the time because someone else is talking. He is two and he knows. You know, I have to remember to tell them how they just amaze me.